Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Live Blogging the Obama Inauguration

Work's letting us watch the swearing in and speech for Obama, so I'll live blog it and then post a transcript after the fact. What fun!

11:38 am - Signed into CNN.com to watch their live report. Got this error message. Looks hauntingly similar to the "virtual waiting room" I sit in every time time the Sox release new batches of tickets.

11:41 am - Allowed in, but need to update my Adobe something or other. At this rate, I'll be able to see the 45th president's inauguration.

11:42 am - Lots of pictures of people on the Mall. Not a port-a-john in site. Hope all of DC's holding it!

11:44 am - The President-elect was just introduced as "Barack H. Obama." That noise you heard was a unified body of rednecks screaming "Barry HUSSEIN" at the TV. Oh wait, nevermind, they don't have cable.

11:46 am - CNN is showing a Facebook status feed. Um, Twitter much? FB status is sooo 2007. So much for Hope and Change.

11:49 am - Scattered applause for Rick Warren and his Purpose Driven Prayer. Surprised he's wearing a tie and not his traditional Hawaiin shirt.

11:53 am - Good prayer. Inclusive, yet definitely Warren-esque with the Lord's Prayer and multiple pronounciations of Jesus.

11:54 am - Aretha Franklin's wearing a bow that looks like it was made for a battleship. Seems fitting.

11:56 am - This begs the question... if McCain had been elected, would they have asked "Boot in Your @$$" Toby Keith to sing "God Bless America?" I say yes.

11:58 am - Joe Biden's orange spray-on tan rocks. I'd like to have a beer with the VP. I bet he makes a mean margarita.

12:05 pm - Sorry for the short break, had to use the potty (probably from the port-a-john reference) and move over to the big office viewing area. Somewhere, six dozen guys are gathered around a national monument, doing the same thing.

12:06 pm - "Barack HUSSEIN Obama... repeat AFTER me, dang it!" - Chief Justice John Roberts.

12:06 pm - Round of applause in the office for the 44th President. How cool would it be to have the military band play "Hail to the Chief" for you? Even if you weren't actually becoming president, it'd still be awesome. I'd pay cash money for that.

12:07 pm - They're showing a whole lot of "young people" in the crowd. What's the over/under for drunk people in a crowd of 2 million? I'm saying it's at least 200,000 (or 10 percent).

12:09 pm - Obama thanks Bush. Definitely a golf clap.

12:10 pm - Starting off talking about the war and the economy (and crappy energy consumption). Hope-O-Meter plummets.

12:11 pm - Bringing the hope back with, "On this day we gather because we have chosen hope over fear."

12:12 pm - "The time has come to set aside childish things." A dig at Pres. Bush? Ba-zing!

12:13 pm - Other than the swearing in, he hasn't made a single vocal gaffe or even uttered an "um." He rocks as a speaker, no doubt about it. My keyboard is the only sound in the office. You could hear a flag-pin drop.

12:17 pm - "Restore the vital trust between the people and their government."

12:17 pm - Eight minutes in and we get the first mention of national security (without using the word "terror"). Therein lies the difference between the Democratic and Republican party for this past election. He does mention "co-operation," though.

12:20 pm - One co-worker is holding a box of tissues. Pass 'em around (no matter who you voted for). The entire crowd's hanging on every word.

12:20 pm - "As the world grows smaller, our common humanity will reveal itself, and the United States must become a distributor of peace." Or something like that. He said it better. Great quote. Can't type fast enough... trying to be quiet.

12:24 pm - "Tolerance and curiosity" nice juxtaposition. He's talking about the truths and integral American qualities that have always defined us.

12:25 pm - "Why a man whose father, less than 60 years ago, could not be served in a restaurant, can now stand before you and take a sacred oath."

12:27 pm - He just finished speaking with the requisite, "And God bless the United States of America." Interesting speech... he didn't deviate from any campaign themes. Definitely called for Americans to stand behind him, like we're in a fight for survival. We'll see if that bodes anything for the first 100 days in office.

12:28 pm - G.W. looks genuinely happy to be done. Whether or not you like him, can you blame him? Eight years in the world's most stressful position has to be a crushing weight. Clinton had a heart attack afterward and Reagan lost his mind (to put it frankly).

12:29 pm - Hello, America. Here's what poetry sounds like. It does not involve Lil' Jon, windows, walls or sweaty testicles.

12:33 pm - I'll get reamed for saying this, but it sounds like Fat Albert is giving the benediction. "Hey, hey, HEY!"

12:33 pm - Watching a live news event WITHOUT anchors' commentary is amazing. Why can't they shut up more often and let viewers think for themselves? We don't always need Wolf Blitzer's beard's input.

12:35 pm - Hey, that guy on the left looked just like Kelsay Grammar! How's Fraiser get front-row seats? And where's Oprah?

12:37 pm - The glare on the TV is making it hard to distinguish faces, but it looks like Bush Sr. shot a bear last time he was up in Kennebunkport, ME and wore it today.

12:38 pm - "And when the Blue Man Group can not be known for their color but as the Cool Jam Crew." (Okay, that was lame on my part.)

12:40 pm - I could make a Family Guy-esque joke about seamen being all over the platform, but it's during the National Anthem, so I won't.

12:40 pm - I think the incoming President should be able to pick his exit music. I'd have gone with, "For those about to Ba-rack, we sa-luuuuute you!" (And the hits just keep on coming).

12:41 pm - Handshakes, congratulations, high-fives, and Hillary looking like she bit into a lemon right before someone goosed her. Time for lunch!

2 comments:

Liz Williams said...

oh Mike. "CNN is showing a Facebook status feed. Um, Twitter much? FB status is sooo 2007. So much for Hope and Change."

You are such a website snob. :)

Danie D said...

"fat albert" marched with mlk jr. you're mean.